Holding Mia (Rockers' Legacy Book 1) Read online

  “I think I’m going to head back to campus,” I announced. “I really can’t deal with any more this weekend.”

  Both Jagger’s and Braxton’s eyes got huge. “You’re just going to leave?” Braxton demanded, getting to his feet.

  I shrugged. “I don’t want to see anyone right now. Especially not Barrick or my dad. So, yeah, I’m leaving.”

  “Not alone. I’ll come with you.”

  “Yeah, no thanks. Regardless of what everyone thinks, I can actually take care of myself and get from Point A to Point B, all without someone holding my hand.” Crossing to Jagger, I hugged him. “Tell Momma I’ll call her. And…that I’m sorry for causing so much trouble.”

  “Love you, sis.”

  I swallowed roughly around the lump that seemed lodged in my throat now. “Love you, Jags.”

  Without even glancing at Braxton—or toward the bedroom I’d just left—I walked away.

  Of course, Braxton followed.

  “Go away, Brax,” I told him tiredly as I stepped into the elevator.

  He only got on with me. “I know you’re pissed at me, but whether you believe me or not, you’re my best friend, Mia.”

  If I was being honest, I wasn’t really mad at him. A little, but not as much as I was where Barrick and Daddy were concerned. Mostly, I was just hurt that he hadn’t even hinted at anything going on behind my back. Because Braxton was my friend. Over the months I’d known him, he’d become just as important to me as Jordan was.

  Wrapping my arms around myself because I felt chilled all the way to my bones, I leaned back against the elevator wall and remained silent the entire ride down to the lobby. Braxton watched me with cautious eyes until we got outside.

  But I didn’t know how I was going to get back to campus.

  A grim smile tilting his lips, Braxton handed the valet attendant a ticket. “Figured you wouldn’t mind if we jacked Barrick’s Jeep. You’ll have to drive, though. I’m not up to this traffic with this damn prosthetic.”

  “I don’t mind driving,” I murmured.

  Some of the strain left his face, and I began to relax a little myself by the time the attendant pulled up the white Jeep in front of us.

  Chapter 19

  Barrick

  Lyla’s town car pulled up in front of her dorm, and I jumped out of the back before it completely came to a stop.

  Waking up alone in bed had caused my heart to stop. I couldn’t feel Mia, and instinctively, I knew she wasn’t in the suite. When I left our room, it was to find her brother the only one still left. He told me Braxton had gone with Mia back to her dorm, then ripped into me for breaking his sister’s heart. I couldn’t blame him, but I didn’t have time for him to bitch at me.

  He’d barely gotten started before I was running out of the suite, searching for my valet ticket. But it was gone, and when I got downstairs, it was to find that Mia and Braxton had taken my Jeep. No taxi or Uber would take me all the way back to campus, so I had no choice but to call Lyla.

  I ran to the front door, but I couldn’t get in without Lyla’s keycard to unlock it for me. Thankfully, she was right on my heels and swiped it quickly. The elevator was just opening when we got to it. Impatient, I pushed in even as a group of girls was attempting to exit.

  “Move it!” Lyla growled at one girl who just stood there dazedly gaping at me, blocking her entrance.

  The girl jerked and then rushed off the elevator as I stabbed Mia’s floor number.

  When the elevator opened again, it was to find half a dozen other freshmen standing in the hall whispering as they looked toward Mia and Lyla’s room. Pushing past them, I stopped when I saw what they’d been so interested in.

  Boxes of Lyla’s things were sitting outside their door, which was propped open. Clothes, pillows, bedding, and even toiletries were stacked on top of each other, spilling out of the tops of the boxes.

  “Shit,” Lyla muttered. “I didn’t think she would be pissed at me.”

  As I got closer to their room, Mia walked out, another box in her arms. She’d changed clothes and pulled her hair into a fresh knot on top of her head. Her face was pale, and her eyes were red-rimmed. Seeing me, she clenched her jaw, but when her green eyes caught sight of Lyla, she threw down the box in her arms and marched up to her roommate.

  “I trusted you,” she seethed. “I thought you were my friend.”

  “Mia, we are,” Lyla tried to assure her. “Just because I was guarding you doesn’t mean we aren’t friends.”

  “You lied to me,” she whispered, but Lyla flinched like she’d shouted in her face. Hurt radiated off Mia in waves so powerful, they made me ache, and I reached for her, only to have her slap my hands away. “I don’t want you here,” she told Lyla, her voice stronger now. “Figured since you didn’t want to be here to begin with, you could either move in with your brother or stay with Howler.”

  “Mia—”

  “You live with me,” I interrupted my cousin, pulling Mia’s attention back to me.

  “I live here,” she informed me in a voice coated with ice. “Braxton went to get my things.”

  “No way. He can just take them back.” I reached for her again, but she backed away from me and then walked into her room.

  Groaning, I followed her, only to have the door slammed in my face before I could cross the threshold. The sound of the lock clicking into place set my teeth on edge. “Mia! Open the door. We have to talk.”

  “Go away, or I’m going to call security,” she threatened.

  “I am the fucking security! Now, open the door before I break it down.”

  With an angry huff, she jerked the door open. “You are not my security any longer, asshole. Take yourself and your backstabbing cousin and get lost. I don’t want to see either one of you.”

  The elevator opened down the hall, and I glanced over the spectators’ heads to find Braxton walking our way with Mia’s huge case towed behind him in one hand and a box in the other.

  “Take it back,” I growled at him.

  “Nope. Sorry, cousin, but you aren’t calling the shots anymore.”

  Mia pushed at my shoulders, but I didn’t even budge. I wasn’t moving out of the way to let him take her stuff into that damn room. The only way I was leaving was with her beside me.

  “Mia, I’m sorry,” Lyla said from behind me. “I didn’t mean to hurt you like this. This started off as a job, I admit that, but after that first week, I really liked you. We are friends, I swear to you.”

  “What’s going on here, people?”

  I stiffened at the sound of a new voice and turned my head to find who I assumed was the RA walking toward us. The group of freshmen watching from a distance moved to one side of the hall so that she could pass.

  Lyla muttered a curse under her breath then shifted so she was in the RA’s path. “This is a private matter, Ruby. We don’t need you putting your big nose in it.”

  “This is my floor, Bennet. It’s my job to ensure all my girls are safe. Little Miss Goody-Two-Shoes here doesn’t look particularly safe from the looks of it.”

  “Fuck off, Ruby,” Mia tossed over her shoulder as she walked back into her room. “I’m not in the mood for your bullshit today.”

  “You’re never around, so I assumed you had dropped out,” Ruby antagonized as she leaned back against the wall close to Braxton. Licking her lips, she eyed him up and down, but he didn’t even seem to notice the attention. He never did. Since losing his leg, he thought no one could possibly want him. He seriously needed to open his eyes.

  Just as long as he didn’t open them in Mia’s direction.

  “You mean you stopped sucking cock long enough to notice I wasn’t around?” Mia gasped in mock shock and stuck her head out the door, eyeing Ruby dispassionately. “Bitch, please. I’ve got enough on my plate right now. I don’t need your bullshit on top of it. Get lost.”

  “If you’re sticking around, make sure you follow all the floor and dorm rules,” the RA muttered as
she started back down the hall the way she’d come. “That means no overnight guests of the opposite sex.”

  Mia gave a humorless laugh, flicking her gaze to me for a second before pushing away from the door. “Not a problem, trust me.”

  The door started to close again, but I was quicker this time, and I pushed it open. But when my cousins started to enter behind me, I kicked it closed and flipped the lock. Lyla could have used her key, but she knew I needed to talk to Mia and wouldn’t interrupt. Braxton, I didn’t know what he would do now. He was switching sides on me, and I wasn’t sure what to think or how to feel about that.

  Mia stood in the middle of the dorm room, her hands on her perfect ass, that cute as fuck glare on her beautiful face. “What do you think you’re doing?”

  “Trying to get your stubborn ass to listen to me.” I ached to touch her, to pull her into my arms and just savor a moment of feeling her against me. Waking up without her in bed beside me after she’d cried herself to sleep while I held her had left me feeling disoriented and scared as hell.

  “The time to get me to listen to you has come and gone, Barrick.” She shifted, causing her sweatshirt to slip off one shoulder. “I don’t want to hear anything you have to say. I’m done. Plain and simple. We’re over. Not that we were ever together to begin with.”

  “Don’t say that.” In three steps, I was in front of her, my hands grasping her narrow hips and pulling her against me. “You have been mine since the night of that first fight, and we will never be over. I love you, Mia.” Her lashes lowered at those last four words, and she turned in my arms, not letting me see her face.

  Releasing a shuddery exhale, I pressed my lips to the back of her head. I knew she felt the same for me that I felt for her, but she wasn’t going to tell me anytime soon. I just needed to be patient and give her time—I hoped.

  “When you love someone, you’re honest with them. You don’t keep something from them that has the potential of destroying them,” she said in a voice so soft, I barely heard her. “You lied to me from day one.”

  “I didn’t lie. I just didn’t tell you about my job. Everything else was the truth, baby. Every moment with you, there wasn’t a single lie.”

  Angrily, she shrugged off my hold and turned to face me. “Everything was a lie. Every kiss, every time we made love. Everything. I fell for a man I didn’t even know. And you were just pretending the whole time. Like you’ve done with every other job you’ve had in the past.”

  “Why do you keep saying I was pretending?” I demanded, frustrated, and knowing I had no one to blame but myself. “I never pretended with you. Never.”

  “You said it yourself!” she yelled, tears filling her big green eyes, making them glitter.

  “When?” I yelled back.

  “You texted Braxton, telling him you didn’t have to pretend anymore and that the job was over.”

  “I don’t know what the hell you were doing with his phone, but you’re taking that message out of context,” I tried to explain, but she rolled her eyes at me.

  “Sure, try to smooth talk your way out of it. Go ahead. It’s what you’re good at. Only, I know your game now, Beast. I won’t fall for your crap again.”

  Frustrated, I dragged my fingers through my hair, dislodging the ponytail and sending the band to the floor. Mia looked down at it for a moment then sighed and picked it up, tossing it at my chest. “I want you to leave. As you said yourself, your job is over. There is no need for you to be around me any longer.”

  “You’re right. There isn’t any need,” I rasped out, and she flinched. “Other than that you’re my heart, and I can’t fucking function without you.”

  “Oh my gods,” she cried. “Stop it, Barrick. I’m tired, and all I want is to be alone so I can cry. Okay? Are you satisfied now?”

  “No, baby. No. I’m sorry that I’ve made you cry. I don’t want you to cry, ever. Let me hold you.” When she shook her head, her arms going around her middle as if to hold herself together, I begged, “Please, Mia.”

  “Just go, Barrick,” she whispered, and I wanted to fall at her feet and plead with her not to send me away. But a tear spilled down her cheek, sparkling like a diamond in the overhead light, making it impossible to breathe. “I-I can’t do this right now.”

  I felt like I was leaving a piece of myself behind, but I gave her what she wanted. As I closed the door behind me, I was in complete agony.

  I would give her this day, but come tomorrow, I was going to make her see that I wasn’t pretending. She was mine, and I wasn’t going to give her up without a fight.

  Chapter 20

  Mia

  My bag felt like it weighed a hundred pounds as I walked out into the crisp morning air Monday morning. Pulling my sunglasses down over my eyes to hide the dark circles under them and the fact that they were still swollen and red from all the crying I’d done since Barrick left on Saturday, I turned in the direction of my class.

  Before I made it ten feet, Braxton limped into view, and my heart stopped for a moment as I paused long enough to look around for his cousin. Seeing no sign of Barrick, I let out the breath I was holding.

  All day Sunday, he’d texted and called so many times, I’d started dreading the sound of my phone going off. I blocked him and then cried myself to sleep. Every time he told me he loved me replayed and echoed in my head. I ached to believe him, but I couldn’t trust anything he said now.

  As Braxton neared, he held out one of the two cups of coffee in his hands. My travel mug that he’d bought me one day at the campus café because I’d complained about all the paper cups we’d been wasting from getting to-go cups every day.

  He wore sunglasses too, so I couldn’t see his eyes, but something in the set of his shoulders told me something was wrong. “What?” I demanded, taking the cup from him.

  “Nothing,” he muttered. “Let me walk you to class.”

  My already-swollen eyes filled with tears all over again, making them ache, and a headache began to throb at my temples. “I don’t need a bodyguard, Brax. So, if that’s why you’re here, so you can follow me around and report back to Barrick or my dad, then fuck off.”

  “Mia—”

  “But if you want to be my friend, I’m okay with that. Just know the difference.” Lifting the cup to my lips, I took a sip, not surprised it was made exactly how I liked it.

  “I am your friend, damn it,” he growled. The tone of his voice told me he was having a bad day, and I instantly felt guilty for having snapped at him. “I want to walk you to class because I missed you, and I just need to be around you to try to shut up this damn noise in my head. Okay?”

  I dropped my shoulders, but I nodded. “Yeah. Okay.”

  Silently, we fell into step together, both of us limping.

  We were halfway across campus when he finally blew out a harsh exhale. “I want you to tell your cousin not to come here next semester.”

  I snapped my head around to frown at him. “Nevaeh?”

  “Of course, Nevaeh,” he muttered.

  My jaw tightening, I looked back at the building in the distance that was my destination. I had a math class, and I didn’t know how I was going to pay attention when all I wanted to do was cry. “Don’t worry about it. I don’t plan on coming back here after Christmas break, so Nev won’t have any reason to come here either.”

  “Wait, what did you just say?” he demanded, pushing his glasses up onto his head, revealing eyes with circles under them even darker than my own.

  “I’m not coming back next semester,” I repeated. “I talked to my mom late Saturday night, and I told her I’m going back to California. She’s looking for an apartment close to UCLA for me because there’s no way in hell I’m moving back in to her house.”

  I didn’t trust my dad any more than I did Barrick. Less, actually. He’d broken something in me, something no amount of his apologizing would ever fix. Before all of this, he was my hero. The one man in the universe I didn’t question had m
y back. Now, I didn’t even want to look at or speak to him.

  “You can’t!” he exploded. “This is going too far, Mia. You have a plan. What happened to that?”

  “The plan changed,” I told him honestly, my voice just as tired as the rest of me. “I never should have come here in the first place. Who was I trying to kid, Brax? I’ll never be anyone other than Nik Armstrong’s daughter. Thinking I could find out who I really am underneath all the fame that comes from being the rocker’s princess was a pipe dream.”

  “Your dad was just trying to keep you safe while you found yourself,” he explained.

  “That is not finding myself. That’s finding an illusion.” A tear spilled free, and I angrily scrubbed it away. Sniffling, I started walking again. After a dozen steps, I realized he wasn’t beside me. Glancing over my shoulder, I saw him standing there just glaring at nothing, his jaw clenched, causing the muscle to tick. “I have to go, or I’m going to be late.”

  He nodded, not looking at me.

  Sighing, I focused on the path in front of me. “See you later.”

  “I’ll call you,” he called after me, but when I glanced back, he was still standing where I left him, still staring angrily at nothing.

  ∆∆∆

  I shouldn’t have been surprised to find Barrick standing outside the door of my math class when the professor released us, but I was. There was a determined set to his chin, but the dark circles under his eyes rivaled my own, and his complexion was sickly pale.

  My heart clenched just seeing him look so miserable.

  Quickly, I pulled my sunglasses back on before he could see me and notice my own misery. Adjusting my bag on my shoulder, I started to walk past him, but his hand shot out quick as a snake striking, and he gently grasped my wrist. With a single tug, he pulled me into his space.

  I barely had time to blink before his head descended and his lips brushed against mine. The kiss was over before it even began, but when he lifted his head, I noticed his face was less tense.