Off-Limits Read online

  Opening my eyes, I told her the truth, even though a part of me died inside as the words left my mouth. “I can’t, Lyla.”

  The hope that had been shining out of her eyes only seconds before burned to ash right in front of me. Jerking her hand out of mine, she stepped back, and it took a willpower I didn’t realize I possessed to keep from pulling her back to me. “You should go. I have some packing to do. I’m leaving in the morning.”

  “Lyla, don’t go,” I tried. But she shook her head and put more distance between us, while I scrambled to find a reason to keep her from leaving. “Please… Josie. She loves you. She needs you.”

  I love you.

  I need you.

  Don’t leave us.

  Yet I kept the words I knew would hold her to me from spilling out.

  Her gaze fell on the sleeping baby in her car seat and lingered, longing pouring from her. “I love Josie. I would do anything for her. But if I stayed, I’d only be giving you permission to break my heart over and over again. Like you do every damn day I see you and you continue to pretend like you don’t want the same things I do.”

  “It isn’t that I don’t want them, baby,” I confessed. “It’s that I can’t have any of them.”

  “No, Graham. You can have anything you want. You just don’t have the balls to fight for it.” A tear fell from her eyes, breaking me, but before I could reach for her, she turned away. “You should go. Jo-Jo should be in her crib at home, enjoying the slumber of the innocent.”

  “Lyla—”

  “Goodbye, Howler.”

  “Lyla!” I barked, only to startle Josie awake. She began to cry just as Lyla’s shoulder began to shake, and I knew Lyla was silently doing the same as my baby girl, but she didn’t pause.

  She walked out of the room with her head held high, leaving me standing there helplessly, watching her go and fighting my own tears.

  Chapter 1

  Lyla

  Three years later

  I hit the sidewalk running, my heart already pounding so hard I could barely breathe.

  My roommate’s call just moments before had equal doses of rage and fear burning through me, making the workout I’d just finished with my cousin Braxton seem like a leisurely stroll through the park in comparison.

  Something was wrong with Josie. Mia said she’d seen bruises on her and suspected there were more that Josie wouldn’t let her see.

  I knew in my heart, all the way to the depths of my soul, that it wasn’t Howler who’d put those marks on his daughter.

  It was Gwen. It had to be her. That selfish cow only thought about herself. Josie deserved a better mother than the one she’d been birthed to.

  And I’d always wished I was the one to fill that position, but stupid Howler was too much of a pussy.

  I got to the dance school in record time, but I stood outside for a few minutes, trying to get my breathing and my emotions under control. Instinct was screaming for me to just run in there, scoop up Josie, and never let her go, but I couldn’t do that in my current condition without scaring her.

  Once my heart rate had slowed a little and I could actually breathe again, I wiped the sweat off my face with the bottom of my shirt and walked as calmly as I could into the studio.

  The place was quiet except for the music coming from a classroom down the hall. Mia’s second class of the evening was the last class on Tuesdays, so there was no one left in the building but her and her students. I forced myself to walk and not run, but as soon as I pushed open the door and saw Josie, I lost it.

  “Lyla!” Josie exclaimed, running toward me excitedly.

  I hadn’t seen her in a few days, but apparently that was enough time for her fucking mother to hurt my girl and make her scared to talk about it.

  She jumped into my arms, and I held her close, breathing in her clean, baby-shampoo smell. I clenched my eyes closed for a moment.

  “Did you come to pick me up?” she asked hopefully, tipping her head back to look at me.

  “I’m never letting you out of my sight again,” I vowed, kissing her forehead and inhaling deeply again. Having her in my arms and being able to smell her little girl scent calmed me and kept me from wanting to do something I knew I shouldn’t.

  Like finding Gwen and stomping her ass into the ground before I put a bullet between her eyes.

  “Really? You promise?”

  Something in her eyes and the way she so skeptically asked me to promise broke my heart, and I blinked back tears. “Pinkie promise,” I choked out.

  She wrapped her finger around mine, and we touched our thumbs together, sealing the promise just as the door slammed open, making the other little girls in the class yelp in fright. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Mia put herself in front of the raging bull storming toward us.

  “Daddy.” Josie clung to my neck, but she smiled up at her father. “Are you picking me up too?”

  “Yes, baby girl.” His eyes were wild, but he couldn’t seem to control himself. “Let me have her, Lyla.”

  “No way.” I tightened my hold on her, shaking my head. “I have her now, and I’m not ever letting her go again.”

  That got me a beaming smile from Josie but a growl from Howler. He took a step closer, trying to intimidate me into giving him what he wanted, but I stood my ground. I would fight him then and there if he tried to pull her out of my arms by force. In my heart, Josie was my baby just as much as she was his, and I would protect her with my last breath.

  The door swung open again, and I wasn’t surprised to see my cousin Barrick run in, sweat dripping off him. Braxton must have called him, but I hadn’t told Brax anything other than to call Howler and tell him to meet me at Josie’s dance school.

  Barrick was in over his head with Mia—hell, we all were where she was concerned—but my older cousin was drowning this time around. I’d never seen him care so much about a job. I felt guilty for my part in deceiving Mia, as did Braxton, but neither of our guilt could compare to Barrick’s. He was trying his hardest to get out of this job so he wouldn’t lose Mia if she ever found out what was going on.

  Howler touched Josie’s back, making her flinch. I felt more than saw it, and I tuned out everything but Josie. “Did that hurt?” I asked her quietly, and after a small hesitation, she buried her face in my neck and nodded.

  I didn’t even hear Mia and Barrick taking the other kids out of the room, but when I placed Josie on her feet, it was to find that everyone else was gone. Dropping to my knees in front of Josie, I gently cupped her sweet, angelic little face in my hands.

  “Jo-Jo, what happened to make your back hurt?”

  “N-nothing,” she stuttered. “I-I fell.”

  “Did your mommy tell you to say that?” I asked in a soft, quiet voice so I wouldn’t scare her, when on the inside, a storm was starting to rage out of control.

  There was another hesitation, but she finally nodded as two fat tears fell from her eyes.

  “Can I see your back?”

  “No!” Josie backed up a few steps, shaking her head so hard her hair started to fall from the ponytail it was in. “No, you and Daddy will get mad at me. Mommy said if I let anyone see Daddy won’t want to see me anymore. He… He w-won’t l-love me anymore.” More tears fell, and I had to put a hand to my throat, willing my heart to stay in my chest.

  “Josie.” Howler’s voice was gentle, belying the rage blazing from his eyes. “Nothing, and I mean nothing, will ever keep me from wanting to see you. I love you more than anything. That won’t ever change, sweetheart. I promise you.”

  “But Mommy said,” she cried. “She said you will be mad at me. I don’t want you to be mad at me, Daddy.”

  “I’m not mad, baby girl. I swear to you. Lyla isn’t mad either. Are you, Lyla?” He fell to his knees beside me, making the two of us seem like a united front. In that moment, we were.

  “Right. I’d never get mad at you, Jo-Jo. You’re my best friend in
the world. Remember? We can tell each other anything.” I held out my hands, silently begging her to put her hand in mine. “Please, Jo. Tell me what happened.”

  “Y-you promise you won’t get m-mad?” she whispered.

  I held up my pinkie to her. “I promise.”

  She wrapped her little finger around mine then touched her thumb to my own. “I-I spilled juice on my new outfit. I didn’t mean to, I swear. But…but it was grape juice, and Mommy said my outfit was expensive. She grabbed me, and she shook me. My teeth snapped together, and I bit my tongue. When I spit…” She let out a shuddery little breath. “When I spit out the blood, it got on her new outfit too, and she hit me.” She touched her back with her hands. “She hit me a lot. It hurt, Lyla. I-it still hurts.”

  I felt Howler begin to shake, and with my free hand, I touched his back. His entire body seemed to jolt at the contact, but he didn’t move away. Instead, he leaned into my touch, and within seconds, his shaking subsided.

  “Will you show me, Jo-Jo?” I asked, still trying to keep my voice calm.

  “O-okay.” She finally gave in, and I was glad. I didn’t want to force her, but I feared that was what it would have come to.

  She turned her back to me and slowly started to lower her leotard. I got to my feet to help her. When she revealed the dark, painful-looking bruises on her lower back, I had to bite back a gasp. Howler’s gaze caught mine, and what I was feeling was reflected in his eyes.

  “What did she hit you with, Josie?” her father asked gruffly.

  “One of my toys,” she mumbled.

  “Did she hit you anywhere else?” I stepped in front of her, wanting to see her face, but Josie shook her head. “Has she done this before?”

  Her face tightened as she hesitated, but I didn’t need her to speak the words aloud to know this wasn’t the first time Gwen had ever touched her daughter with violence.

  Straightening, I pulled my hair out of its sweaty ponytail and redid it to make sure no strands were loose. Taking out my earrings, I placed them in Howler’s palm. He didn’t say anything, didn’t ask what the hell I was doing. He knew.

  He knew, and he wasn’t going to stop me.

  He wrapped his fist around my diamond studs before putting them in his front jeans pocket. Then he helped Josie fix her leotard. “Josie, you don’t have to be scared anymore. Your mom isn’t ever going to come near you again.”

  “R-really?” Her little voice shook, and I saw the doubt in her eyes.

  “Do you want to see her?” She shook her head, and Howler gave her the most reassuring smile he could muster. “Then you won’t have to. Daddy can promise you that much, baby girl.”

  She threw herself into her father’s arms, hugging his neck and sobbing. “Th-thank y-y-you, D-d-daddy.”

  My heart throbbing, I turned away from the sight that had the power to make me drop to my knees and walked over to the door. The clock on the wall told me it was time for parents to pick up their kids. Opening the door, I listened, waiting while my rage only festered and burned brighter with every passing minute.

  By the time I heard Gwen’s voice, all the other girls were gone.

  I stepped out of the classroom, making sure to shut the door behind me. Through the glass, Howler caught my gaze again and gave me a single nod. Turning, I started toward Gwen, barely noticing Barrick and Mia off to the side.

  Seeing me, Gwen took a step back, fear in her eyes. But the bitch must have been on something or drunk off her ass, because she had the balls to smirk at me and run her mouth. “If it isn’t the little puppy who’s always chasing after my man. What’s wrong, Lyla? Mad again because Howler won’t touch you? Or is it that he knocked me up when he was supposed to be in love with you?”

  I balled my hands into fists, her words only adding fuel to the inferno aflame inside of me. I wasn’t even sixteen when Howler broke up with Gwen. It was weeks later that she told him she was pregnant. Maybe Howler had loved me then, but I was too young for him to even tell me his feelings. I wasn’t going to hold that against him.

  When I reached her, I finally let all the rage and chaos blowing like a hurricane inside of me loose on her. I didn’t remember what I screamed at her or what I did to her. My anger was so strong, I blacked out.

  She’d put her hands on Josie in violence. Why? Because Josie accidentally spilled juice on a new, expensive outfit? What a piece of shit.

  By the time my rage had mostly burned out, Gwen was curled in the fetal position, sobbing that she was sorry and that it would never happen again. There was blood all over her and more bruises on her face and arms than Josie had marring her precious little body.

  “You’re right,” I told her as I stood. “It won’t ever happen again, because you won’t ever see Josie again.”

  “Y-you can’t take her away from me!” Gwen yelled, trying to get up. But the beating I’d just dished out had done a hell of a lot of damage. I wasn’t sure, but I might have broken a few of her ribs and her wrist. “I-I’m her mother. She’s mine.”

  “No. She’s mine. You just gave birth to her.” I bent at the waist and grinned at her, making her gulp in fright. “And if you ever come near her again, I’ll fucking kill you.”

  Chapter 2

  Howler

  Judge was already waiting at my house when we got there. When Lyla had called him requesting a cleanup crew, he’d told her he was on his way to my place with a doctor to examine Josie.

  I didn’t know if I wanted to put her through an ER visit, but I knew she needed to be checked over. Thankfully, my best friend had a solution for it with one of the doctors who stitched up and checked us over after fights in the Underground.

  Turning off my SUV, I stepped out and opened the back door where Lyla was sitting beside Josie’s booster seat. Josie was sound asleep, but Lyla hadn’t wanted to be all the way in the front seat away from her in case Josie woke up and was scared. Both back doors had the child safety locks engaged in case Josie ever got adventurous. So far, she hadn’t, but better safe than sorry.

  Lyla was already unbuckling Josie’s seat belt and then lifted her into her arms. Lyla still had that magic ability to not wake my daughter when she shifted her from one place to another, but now Lyla was stuck because she couldn’t climb out of my huge SUV without falling.

  I scooped her into my arms, solving her dilemma but causing one of my own.

  I fucking loved having her there. Standing with both Lyla and Josie in my arms felt so damn right, all I wanted to do was savor it. Touching my forehead to the side of Lyla’s, I breathed in deeply, getting a mix of her perfume and my little girl’s baby shampoo.

  The entire evening had been a nightmare. I didn’t know if I could have handled it as calmly as I had without Lyla there to help me. She’d been so good with Josie, which didn’t surprise me. But she’d kept her cool in front of my little girl before she couldn’t take it any longer.

  Then she’d kicked Gwen’s ass. I didn’t even get to see the final results, but I knew she must have done some major damage. I’d heard Gwen sobbing even through the closed classroom door. Thankfully, by then, Josie was already asleep, so she didn’t hear her mother begging Lyla to stop.

  One of Lyla’s chilled hands touched the side of my face. “I’m sorry, but it looks like you’re stuck with me for a while. I’m moving in with you until Josie is better.”

  “Jesus Christ, Lyla. I want you here. You know that.” I touched my lips to her temple, torturing myself further. Her skin felt like silk against my lips, and I wanted to kiss every inch of her body to see if the rest of her was just as soft.

  “I know what you want, Howler,” she said so quietly I could barely hear her, even as close as we were. “The problem is, you don’t have the nerve to take it.”

  Turning her head away, she glanced at my house. It was only about half as big as the one she’d grown up in with her brother, but it was still too big for just Josie and me. I’d built it myself
after my dad died, leaving me responsible for his entire construction company. I was an architect, and Dad and I had always planned on being a team, but I was thrown a curve ball when he died.

  When I designed this house, it was with the future in mind. Filling it with more kids, maybe a dog…

  And Lyla.

  Having Lyla share this house with me was something I’d always dreamed about but never allowed myself to hope for. Now that she was going to be staying with me for Josie’s sake, I was going to be in the sweetest kind of hell.

  Fighting back a groan, I carried them into the house. Judge met us at the door. The doctor was already in the living room, and I placed Lyla on the couch while she carefully woke up Josie.

  The next hour was just as much of a nightmare as the previous few had been. Josie cried a lot and Lyla tried not to, but she couldn’t hold back a few tears. Judge stood off to the side of the room so he wouldn’t scare his goddaughter. His rage was just as powerful as my own, but Judge didn’t have anyone to help him keep his in check.

  When the doctor left, Lyla took Josie upstairs for a bath and to get her ready for bed. Josie had preschool Monday, Wednesday, and Friday every week. I told her she didn’t have to go if she didn’t want to, but she’d gotten upset. My girl liked school and playing with her friends, so I wasn’t going to deny her if she actually wanted to go.

  Fuck, who was I kidding? I wouldn’t deny Josie anything. Ever.

  As soon as Lyla and Josie were up the stairs, Judge walked over to stand beside me. “I’ll have a court order by the morning to ensure Gwen no longer has even an ounce of custodial rights to Josie.”

  “I want her in jail,” I gritted out.

  “I would love to lock her up right now, Howler. But Lyla just fractured two of her ribs and broke the bitch’s wrist. I can’t have Gwen arrested, or it would put Lyla at risk. Give me a few weeks, let what happened tonight settle down, and then I’ll find something on her. Fuck, even if I have to have someone plant drugs on her, I’ll have her behind bars within a month. I promise.”

  Blowing out a frustrated breath, I nodded. “Yeah, okay. I don’t want Lyla at risk any more than you do. Just do what you have to and make Gwen go away for as long as possible.”