Needing Forever VOL 1: Part of The Rocker... Series Universe Read online

  I saw a few fists swing, hair flying in all directions, and the venue’s security rushed to break up the small mob. As I walked off stage, I saw the shirt being ripped apart, three different women getting a piece of the tee that was soaked in my sweat.

  “You always did like stirring up trouble,” a deep voice commented as I followed my band.

  My heart rate sped up, that stupid, weak organ pounding against my rib cage like a drum, and I kept walking. “Trouble is fun,” I called over my shoulder.

  I didn’t have to look back to know he was following. I could feel him even from a few feet away. His aura attracted mine like a magnet, trying to pull my soul out of my body and cling to his. I fought the pull, though, because it only led down one avenue, which would leave me with a heart that hurt twice as badly every time he kicked me out of his life.

  We walked through the huge corridors, surrounded by security as we followed the road manager back to the dressing room. I wanted something stronger than a beer, but that was the only booze on offer here, along with the buffet of food that had been provided for both us and the Alchemy guys.

  Bishop was sitting on one of the sofas, his wife on his lap, rubbing his hand across her flat belly. I grabbed two of the beers out of the huge ice bucket and flopped carelessly down beside him. “You look particularly pleased with yourself, Bitch-up.”

  He didn’t even blink at my twist of his name, that smug look on his face telling the world just how content he was now that he had his little beauty in his arms. He was a stoic, sometimes sour kind of asshole whenever Kenzie wasn’t around. The two-week tour that took us across the Midwest over the summer had been hell on all of us, not just the members of Alchemy. Sharing one bus between our two bands ensured we got the full experience of Bishop being pissed at the world that he was without his sweet wife.

  “We’re gonna be uncles,” Jake announced. “Kenzie is preggos.”

  “The fuck,” Linc laughed, coming forward and pulling Kenzie off Bishop’s lap, making her husband growl in displeasure. Linc swung her around twice before hugging her against his huge frame. “That’s great news, sweet pea. Do Ax and Dallas know yet?”

  She giggled softly, shaking her head. “No. I wanted to tell Bishop before we shared the news with them. They’re coming for a visit next week, and I want to tell them then. So please don’t tell Dallas. Or Harper,” she said, pointing a finger at him with a stern face that belied how sweet and kind she was. She pulled off the “I mean business” mommy look pretty well for someone who barely weighed the equivalent of my right leg. “I know how you are when you start talking to either of those two. And Harper will call Dallas, and Dallas will tell Axton. I don’t need him pouting because I didn’t tell him myself.”

  Linc held up his hands in surrender. “I won’t say a word to either of them. Swear.” Then he was hugging her again, smacking a kiss on her cheek. “Congrats, baby girl.”

  While I watched them, I finished one beer, then popped the top on another. Every time the bitter taste touched my tongue, I prayed it would turn into something stronger. A little 151 to put me out of my mind right then would have been a godsend.

  Emmie’s road manager, who’d handled our tour as well, clapped his hands to get everyone’s attention. I rolled my eyes and sucked down the second beer in one go. “The crew is almost done with the stage changeover. You’re ready to go, Alchemy.”

  “Stick around,” Bishop told us as he tossed his arm around Kenzie’s shoulders. “I want to take you guys to dinner later for helping out with this.”

  “You don’t have to do that, man,” Jasper assured him. “Food is overrated. I’d rather you just get us really smashed. Beer just ain’t cutting it tonight.”

  “Second that,” I muttered. Who needed fucking food when I could drink my dinner?

  “Dinner and then to a club, it is,” Bishop said with a nod. “See you after.”

  I glanced at the ice bucket across the room, debating how much energy it would take to get up and walk over to grab a few more beers. I should have been downing water like my life depended on it. My throat was on fire, and I needed to hydrate after being out in that heat, baking under the lights of the stadium.

  My jeans were soaked with sweat, clinging to me. I needed a shower and fresh clothes, along with two gallons of water to replace everything I’d just lost on stage. Instead, I was wishing we had more than just the road manager running around doing God knew what so I didn’t have to get my own beer.

  Linc muttered something under his breath and walked over to the ice bucket. It was more like an ice barrel, loaded with all the drinks that were replenished throughout the day. Grabbing three waters and a beer, he walked back over to my sofa and dropped down beside me. “Drink these,” he growled. “Then you can have the beer.”

  “Sure, Dad,” I groused, jerking the first bottle of water out of his hands and guzzling it down.

  “Someone’s in a bitchy mood,” Leif, my drummer, said with a grunt.

  “Shut up and drink your beer,” Linc snapped at him as he pushed the second water into my hand. “Here. Finish it, and I’ll give you the beer.”

  “I’m not a fucking kid. I don’t need you treating me like—”

  “Like what?” He broke in. “Like you’re not being too stubborn to take care of yourself? You want to fuck up your body, do it when I’m not around. Because I’m not going to sit here and let you pickle your insides just because you want to prove something.”

  “I hate it when Daddy and Daddy fight,” Winston said dejectedly, playing with something on his phone.

  “Daddy,” Jasper cried, his eyes on Linc. “Are you and Daddy getting a divorce?”

  Linc flipped him off without looking away from me. “Fuck off.”

  “Don’t tear our family apart, Daddy,” Leif begged. “We want to be happy again.”

  I lost the fight I had on my grin and twisted off the top of the bottle. “I think you like being called ‘daddy’ way too much.”

  “Only when it’s you, babe.” He winked as he sat back, his green eyes heated as they skimmed over me.

  My cock hardened to the point of pain at that fucking wink. That easy and he could make me want him. From day one, that was how it was with this guy. My body wasn’t my own when he was around. He could control it with as little as a wink, making me ache for him. Didn’t matter that he’d broken my heart over a dozen different times in the past two years. My cock didn’t seem to give a damn.

  All I could think about was his mouth sucking me off, his huge hands on every part of my body.

  Chapter 2

  Linc

  Some guy in a suit put down a huge tub filled with ice, beer, and bottles of champagne on the floor between the two large sectionals in the roped-off section of the club’s VIP floor. A minibar was set up off to the side with our own personal bartender. I could feel the eyes of people below, staring and whispering about us.

  Trance and Alchemy were up-and-coming bands, so most people knew exactly who they were these days. With my two best friends married to a Demon and a rock god, I was used to the stares and whispers whenever we went out. Fuck, even before Dallas married Axton Cage, I’d gotten used to all of that. She was an ex-model, so she drew attention whether she wanted it or not.

  Kenzie was cuddled between Bishop and me, drinking ginger ale like it was the giver of life. I was happy for her and her husband. She deserved to be happy after the fucked-up childhood she’d lived through.

  But I reluctantly admitted to myself I was kind of jealous of her. Of anyone in a committed relationship, really. I wanted that kind of happily ever after. Craved it now, when I’d always made fun of it in the past.

  My parents made me think there wasn’t a happy ending out there for me. I believed them until I met Rhett, but I didn’t trust it. Now that I knew what I felt for him wasn’t going to disappear, I realized just how wrong my mom and dad really were.

  I had happiness right at the tip of my fingers. I just needed
to reach out and grasp it before it faded from my life completely.

  Rhett was being stubborn, though. Part of me knew he would be over this situation, while the rest of me expected him just to fall back into my life like he had so many times in the past. He wanted me to work for it, so I fucking would.

  But from the way he was acting right now, I knew it wasn’t going to be easy.

  From where I was sitting, I could see part of his phone screen. He wasn’t making it any secret that he was on some hookup app, looking for a quick fuck. The asshole was making sure I saw it, pushing my buttons.

  Jealousy ate at me, making me tighten the hold I had on my bottle of water. I was staying away from alcohol tonight, wanting to keep a clear head as I tried to figure out how to make Rhett realize I wanted him for keeps this time.

  A new message popped up on his screen, and from what I could see of it, his hookup was actually at the club. Rhett pocketed his phone as he stood. His chocolate gaze caught mine, and he smirked before walking off without saying a single word.

  I sat forward, my hands balling into fists between my legs. I had to keep my cool. Killing some stranger because the man I loved arranged to hook up with him would only get me locked up. There would be no happily ever after from a fucking jail cell.

  Seconds ticked into minutes, until I couldn’t stand it anymore.

  I jerked to my feet so suddenly, Kenzie yelped in surprise. I didn’t have time to apologize as I rushed after Rhett.

  Having had plenty of club hookups myself over the years, I knew exactly where to look to find him and his fuck buddy. It was dark outside the men’s room, but it was empty. I pushed open the bathroom door, but there were only a few men standing at the urinals taking a piss. The stall door at the end was wide open and empty.

  Gritting my teeth, I walked right back out and looked for the emergency exit. Seconds later, I pushed it open, stepping out into the humid night air. To my right was the back parking lot for the employees. To my left, the dumpster.

  And Rhett letting some stranger put his lips on him.

  Rage filled me, making me blind to everything but the man pressing the love of my life up against the wall beside some nasty dumpster. I didn’t remember moving. One second, I was standing just outside the door, the next I was pulling the guy off Rhett and throwing him across the parking lot.

  Rhett was talking, smarting off, no doubt, but I couldn’t hear what he was saying. The blood was pumping in my ears, deafening me. I grabbed him, thankful I didn’t have to be gentle with him, and crushed my mouth down on his, desperate to erase the taste of that stranger from his lips.

  He didn’t resist, not even for a single second. The way he returned the kiss told me how much he wanted it. The hookup must not have kissed his lips yet, because all I could taste was Rhett and the booze he’d been sucking down like it was water. It wasn’t sweet like nectar, but spicy, like the cinnamon candy he was always chomping on.

  I thrust my tongue deep into his mouth just as he shifted his hips, rubbing his hard-on against my own, making us both groan in pleasure. My cock hadn’t had anyone’s attention but my own for months, and right then, all it wanted was to feel Rhett’s cock rubbing against it, his hand jacking it, his mouth sucking it deep into his throat.

  My tip leaked, causing a wet spot to dampen all the way through my boxer briefs to my pants.

  I was so lost, I didn’t hear the hookup scrambling to his feet and running away. The smell of the garbage rotting in the August heat didn’t even faze me as I worked my fingers deftly at Rhett’s belt, desperate to free his cock so I could feel it in my palm once again.

  As soon as I released him, I wrapped my fist around him, pumping from the base all way up to the tip. His cock was slightly shorter than my own but thicker. I could barely see it in the shitty light, but I didn’t need to see to know his cock was white-hot and it was pouring pre-jizz from the tip. I smeared the thick liquid over his mushroomed head, lubing his length so I didn’t rub him raw.

  “Fuck,” he growled, his head falling back against the wall. “Ah, fuck.”

  “Do you want me?” I whispered just as my teeth found the corded muscles of his neck and sank in. He jerked in pleasure, his breathing becoming more labored. “Say it, Rhett. Say you want me.”

  “Yes,” he groaned. “I fucking want you.”

  That was all I needed to hear before I was dropping to my knees in front of him. I swallowed him whole, my gag reflex nonexistent as he hit the back of my throat then sank deeper. I sensed his knees going weak and grabbed his hips, pinning him to the wall with both hands as I sucked his cock.

  It took less than five minutes before he was shooting his load down my throat and I was swallowing every drop. When he began to slowly deflate in my mouth, I stood and carefully tucked him back into his jeans before kissing his forehead. His arms went around my waist as he leaned more into me than the security of the wall behind him.

  I held him, gently petting his hair and back while his entire body shook with the aftershocks. My own cock was about to split through the seam of my pants, but he didn’t matter at the moment. All I wanted was to soak up Rhett’s afterglow before confessing what I came to tell him.

  Long minutes passed, and he finally started to shift against me. I brushed my lips over his jaw before nipping softly at his earlobe. “I came here tonight to tell you one thing.” He stiffened against me, and I hurried to spit out the rest before I lost my courage. Squeezing my eyes closed, I jumped in headfirst for the first time in my life. “I love you, Rhett.”

  ✽✽✽

  The words were still echoing around us as I waited for Rhett to respond to my confession. I was the one whose legs were weak now, my knees threatening to buckle as I waited for him to laugh in my face.

  I’m too late.

  Those three little words that I used to think were a total joke when it came to your significant other were the most powerful I’d ever spoken. They didn’t come lightly, and I was scared to death I was too late.

  Doubt and dread began wreaking havoc in my head and gut. He was over me. He didn’t want to try again. Why would he even bother with me now? I’d treated him like shit repeatedly, kicking him out again and again because he scared the fuck out of me. If I were him, I wouldn’t want to be with me now either.

  Tears burned my eyes and I tried to blink them back, but I quickly lost the fight. “I’m sorry,” I choked out. “I’m so fucking sorry for all the shit I put you through. I know… God, I know I hurt you over and over again, and my only excuse is that I was scared. I’ve loved you from the beginning, but I was terrified of giving you that much power over me. You are the only person I have ever wanted for keeps, and I didn’t know how to handle that.”

  Rhett finally lifted his head, meeting my gaze, unable to see my tears in the dark, but there was no way he was deaf to them. “But you do now?” he rasped.

  “Yes,” I vowed. “I want you back. Fuck, I love you so damn much, and I’m tired of being scared. Give me another chance. P-Please.”

  He grew quiet again, and I didn’t know what to think. Rhett Tomlinson wasn’t one to just go quiet. He was cocky and mouthy, and that was only one of a million things that I loved about him, but it annoyed the hell out of me at the same time.

  Licking his lips, he gave a single nod, as if coming to his decision. “I’ve waited years for you to say you love me. Years, man. And every time I thought you were going to say it, you broke up with me instead. I get that you were scared. Loving you has always scared me too. You’re intense and broody, and that was what attracted me to you in the first place. But I don’t trust you not to throw me away the second you start getting spooked all over again.”

  I swallowed the sob that threatened to choke me and grabbed his hands. “Give me one more chance. That’s all I’m asking for. Just one. I won’t fuck it up again.”

  He shook his head. “I don’t know if I can.”

  Panic started to climb the walls of my sanity. “Rhe
tt—”

  “Show me,” he said, cutting me off. “Prove to me this time is different, and maybe—maybe—I will give us another try.”

  Relief hit me like a wrecking ball, and I had to lock my knees before I fell at his feet in gratitude. Backing him against the wall again, I lowered my head, brushing a soft kiss over his lips. “Thank you,” I breathed. “I won’t disappoint you again, Rhett.”

  Chapter 3

  Rhett

  A pounding fist on my hotel room door had me jerking awake. I blinked my eyes open before squinting at the digital clock on the bedside table. When the numbers were too blurry to make out, I knew I’d taken my contacts out the night before.

  “Huh. Guess I didn’t go to bed drunk, then,” I muttered to myself as I flopped over in bed. “That’s a first.” I couldn’t remember the last time I hadn’t gone to bed smashed, but there was no throbbing headache or queasy stomach to refute it.

  Scrubbing both hands over my face, I groaned, because I didn’t want to be awake. There was nothing for me to do today, so why the fuck was someone trying to wake me up?

  The pounding came again, and I lifted my head to glare at the door. “Go the fuck away!” I shouted. “I don’t need any housekeeping today.”

  “I’m not the damn maid,” Linc’s voice called through the door. “You stood me up, asshole. I’m trying to make sure you’re not dead.”

  I jerked upright and bounced out of bed. I was still wearing my boxer briefs, but nothing else. Still, it was better than nothing, so I threw open the door for him. Everything was starting to come back to me now that my brain was wide awake.

  The alley outside the club the night before. Linc throwing the guy I’d arranged to hook up with across the parking lot before kissing me. One of the best blow jobs of my life.

  Then Linc blowing my mind with three little words.

  I love you.

  I didn’t think there were any other word combinations that sounded as amazing as those three. I’d given up hope that this guy would ever say them to me, told myself repeatedly I’d moved on. But as soon as they were out of his mouth, I felt myself admitting the truth.